What's it really like to attend CES?

Okay, so, I'm throwing things into a rollie and a backpack to head off to the Consumer Electronics Show tomorrow. It's the usual drill, which I could probably do in my sleep by now, but I still have to apply some consciousness. For example, tomorrow evening I get my rental bike delivered to the hotel, but Vegas is going to be cool this year. So, I have to pack light but warm items: wool cap, ski glove liners, windproof shell.

And I'm not taking my HP Jornada as a note-taking device for the first time since 1998. This time, I need to stay connected. So, an old Lenovo X301 with Windows 7, solid-state storage, 3G and WiFi will have to do it. Oh, and extra battery. At this point, I'm as ready as anyone can be for the chaos that is CES. What is going to be like there? The rest of this post highlights various aspects of the show, some perennial, some dynamic.

Timing: January 5-9

This year, CES is getting ahead of itself. For years, since the change from the traditional Sunday to Thursday schedule to the more-recent Wednesday to Sunday calendar, the show has been trying to slip backward toward the beginning of the week. In the old days, people would come in at the end of the weekend, have a few meetings Sunday night, and then dig into however much of a week they wanted or had to. We typically bailed around Thursday and went to Pebble Beach. But now, the show starts at an indeterminate point in the middle of the week, and in theory goes on through the weekend, but only the desperate and those people traveling long distances stayed around that long.

So, the show would be shorter, but it's beginning to extend on the front end. Wednesday, January 5, is supposed to be the pick-up-your-badge-holder-and-get-settled day, but half the announcements from important vendors will be on that day or even on Tuesday (sure enough, there were plenty of them). Of course, I planned for the official schedule and so will be in the air for much of it. The benefit of the schedule change was never clear to me in the first place, and I would definitely vote to change it back.

The News

Of course it's a three-ring circus, but the news of interest to me this year is the tablet announcements. Without getting into all the details, the tablet market was moribund until Apple set it off with its iPad. Now, everyone else wants in. Even Microsoft, which debuted tablet software in November 2000 at the defunct Comdex tradeshow, has to pretend it has never seen a tablet before and reintroduce one this year. CEO Steve Ballmer is reportedly set to do just that during his keynote. I had figured that anywhere from 20 to 40 new tablet models would be announced. Last week, Craig Ellis of Caris & Co estimated 69. How he got that precise number, I'm not sure. My own estimate is that only 25-40 percent of those will actually come to market, and many fewer still will find commercial success.

Of course, there will be all sorts of other "news." A limited list includes things like:

• Telematics (e.g., car electronics from Ford, Audi, and others)
• Location-based services (everything from navigation to coupons)
• Mobile health (a growing category, this year often in the form of a sensor device and iOS app, but Qualcomm has a whole section devoted to its effort)
• Tablet and phone cases, stands, accessories (e.g., Bluetooth keyboards)
• Tablet-while-you-wait (KeDi Communication Technology Co., Ltd. from the Haidian District of Beijing, will brew one up for you on the spot based on nVidia's Tegra 2 dual core A9)
• Digital cameras galore, photo frames (always an in-season)
• High-end digital audio (don't miss out on Dolby's introduction)
• Smartphones for old people from Doro of Sweden
• Universal phone mounts
• Augmented reality running on most mobile platforms
• Batteries and power delivery systems
• Glasses-free 3D TV from Toshiba
• Internet or Smart TV (e.g., Google TV)
• Wireless induction chargers (e.g., ElectroHub, N 5212)
• Wireless cooking thermometer (e.g., iGrill -- Bluetooth iOS app with multiple probe types)
• Robotics
• Greenpeace product survey results (Thursday, 8-8:30, S227, breakfast provided)
• Green technology (e.g. Urban Green Energy)
• Regional events (I've counted one each from China, Korea and Japan)
• Plenty of "pre-announcements" (e.g., the Asus press conference that took place this afternoon)

Las Vegas

Vegas is always Vegas, a little worse for wear these past few years, what with being the epicenter of the real estate meltdown, but also reinvigorated with the vibrant new complex at CityCenter. It's all a bit cheesy, a tad flashy, but occasionally transcendent (e.g., the fountains at Bellagio, the Cirque du Soleil). Mostly it's a big venue with lots of hotel suites, meeting rooms, restaurants and convenient watering holes.

McCarran Airport

McCarran -- named after former Nevada Senator Patrick Anthony McCarran, known for his vehement opposition to Franklin D. Roosevelt and implacable anti-Communist sentiments -- matches the Las Vegas Convention Center (LVCC) in its industrial-grade capacity. Although somewhat small by absolute measures, the airport's ability to process people is legendary. On arrival, the nightmare of getting from baggage claim to the city introduces conference attendees to only the first of many queues they will endure over the next several days. On departure, it is the endlessly snaking security lines that appear most daunting to the hapless passenger who hasn't left enough time to make his or her flight. However, in both cases, one seems to eventually make it through.

The Weather

One year it rained. Otherwise, temperatures start out at a crisp 4.5 to 7 degrees celsius first thing in the morning and warm up to a pleasant 12-14 degrees at midday (for Americans unaccustomed to metric, that's 40-45 degrees and 55-60 degrees). The long-range forecast indicates just about these conditions this year: clear and mild. Take a fleece pullover or sweater for the evenings, though. Although this is the desert, it is wintertime.

Local Transport

The scale of Vegas makes walking very tough. The slightest thing -- from, say, your elevator bank to the nearest place to get a coffee -- could be a quarter of a mile away. Merely walking across the Venetian from the porte-cochere to the conference facilities in the rear covers -- with all the twists and turns to dodge the slot machines -- almost half a mile.

Years ago I rented a car (on somebody else's dime). It's expensive to rent and park, and you spend most of your time sitting in horrendous traffic.

The monorail is one of the best ways to navigate the city. It starts at the MGM Grand south of Flamingo, and stops at the back of Paris, the Flamingo, and Harrah's before hitting the convention center. Coming the other way, it runs from the Sahara by way of the Hilton to the convention center.

CES offers free buses. If you take these you get to stand in line to board while being gassed by idling bus fumes, then rumble with your fellow human through the same sclerotic streets as everyone else, finally to be dropped within Vegas "walking distance" of your hotel. The benefit is the buses go some places where the monorail doesn't.

My own preference is a bicycle, which I rent every year from an obliging local outfit. One of their guides drops the bike at the bell desk for me the evening I get in and takes it back the morning I leave. I spend my time cruising between stalled cars and can get anywhere in the likely landscape in 10 minutes tops. I have an opportunity to be outdoors in the often lovely weather, pump the blood up a bit between sessions sitting in various rooms, and can make 29 appointments in three days.

Las Vegas Convention Center

This monster venue is a wonder to behold. With three major sections -- North, Central, and South -- the Las Vegas Convention Center boasts 3.2 million square feet of total space under a single roof. With 16 exhibit halls, the LVCC offers almost 2 million square feet of actual exhibit space, 110,00 square feet of lobby and concourse area, 144 meeting rooms, ceiling heights ranging from 25 to 35 feet, and "free" internet access throughout (nota bene: WiFi is not really designed for massive simultaneous use. Your results will vary).

Some years ago, I arrived early with a crew charged with setting up a booth. We had to locate our stuff and make sure it was going to be in the right place at the right time. The sun had just set and it was still quite warm when we arrived at the back of the South hall. What we found -- framed by the dusty yellow sky and the intense parking-lot sodium lights -- looked like logistics assembled for the D-Day Invasion of Normandy beaches. From the corner of the building, we could see -- for more than one-third of a mile down the South wall -- row after row after row of trucks and pallets and forklifts and gear, packed in plastic wrap, piled in pyramids, and strapped together, silently waiting for the workers who would arrive soon to begin the massive effort of bringing it all indoors and setting it up for the show the next day. The tonnage was overwhelming.

The Badges

The badge story at CES is Byzantine. There are various classes of attendees -- press/analysts, exhibitors, plain ol' vanilla conference-goers, speakers -- and they all are typically preregistered. I've never known anyone to sign up onsite, but surely it can be done. However, no one wants to lose precious time registering. But still, preregistering only gets you a badge. You still have to get your badge holder. The press and analysts have to tag especially backstreet venues in order to get their holders, this year in the basement of the Venetian and at the far end of the LVCC. In compensation, they are typically offered backpacks, courtesy of a major show sponsor. The all-time ugly one was a little Toshiba number in barf green that was handed out one year in the mid-2000s. I think the hotel staff in the Imperial Palace ended up with mine.

The Keynotes

Would it be horrible if I admitted that in all the years I've been coming to the show, I've never been to a single keynote speech? These highly orchestrated events are usually leaked well before they run, pretty predictable in what the industry luminaries on stage say and well covered by the world's top technology press, whose attendance is de rigueur. I'd much rather read about them online than try to get into the hot, crowded venues where they take place. In some years, Microsoft CEO Bill Gates would fill the hall to overflowing and even the live TV feed rooms were oversubscribed. Nope, I'll take mine with coffee the next morning.

The Sessions

Does anybody go to these other than family members of the speakers? Admittedly, some of the topics can be interesting, but education is hardly why people attend CES. I've spoken on a panel or two in my time, and I can tell you the room was pretty empty. It could have been me, or the topic, but safe to say nothing earth shattering happened in that room during the 45 minutes I was there.

The Floor

The show floor is a cacophony. The quality of exhibits runs the spectrum, all the way from the Microsoft and Intel booths -- massive showcases of current products with sound-proofed rooms in back to show future products to the select few -- to every small company with a product or service related to consumer electronics. You can bet that a lot of them will be flogging accessories for Apple products this year. Apple, itself, is, of course, elsewhere.

The Attendees

Once upon a time, vendors met developers and distributors at the show. A trade booth was a modest enough affair, a place where vendors could show their proposed wares to people who might actually buy them. All that is long gone. These days, the venue is stuffed to the gills with "students" and industrial spies. Mostly, your competitors, in various guises, come to your booth to see what you have. But one time, wandering among the hangers on and n'ere-do-wells, with no more than a single friend by his side, I saw News Corp. CEO Rupert Murdoch. I thought: familiar face. Looking down at his badge, I saw "Rupert Murdoch" written in large letters. Security obviously wasn't much of a concern. So, you never know.

Hotel Venues

Many of the largest and most serious vendors (which include my customers) take space in hotels around the city. They do so because they want a quiet place where they can control the variables to show vetted guests sensitive things like prototypes of potential future products or finished versions of products that will be introduced later in the year. Also, the hotels can offer better space and service for a better price in most cases. If a vendor doesn't have to worry about drawing traffic, its best interests are served entertaining off the floor. This parasitic behavior depends on the existence of the show to create a moment when the whole industry is in one place, and yet it contributes nothing to the show's producers. In the extreme case, all the best-heeled vendors could boycott the show floor and drive CES out of business, ending the excuse everyone needs to be in Vegas at the same time once a year.

The Food

The food in Vegas runs the gamut, from branded fast food in the food courts to fine dining with internationally known chefs. CES provides basic fare for a price on the floor. Of course, the only thing I eat in three days is finger food standing up. Everyone gives a reception, offers sandwiches at their booths or has catered food brought up to the hotel suite with the magnificent view of the strip or the desert. There's lots of food, but no time to eat it.

For most journalists and analysts, the show kicks off with Digital Experience, a large venue, held in recent years at Caesar's Palace, in which many of the most interesting vendors field usually modest tables to show newly minted products. A fully staffed martini bar carved from a solid block of ice greets you at the door, and the food offered at Digital Experience spans many ethnicities and parts of the meal, from egg rolls to sushi to tacos to roast beef. To finish, try dipping a fresh strawberry into the chocolate waterfall.

The Parties

The first part of my schedule to get booked up is the evenings. Everyone throws a party. Now, before you get too jealous, even if the hosting company hires a real name band -- I seem to remember Counting Crows, or maybe it was the Black Crowes, or Sheryl Crow, whatever -- the esteemed invitees represent a pretty narrow demographic (read: geeks). Liquor flows, food is scarce and the crowd is overwhelmingly male, overweight and could use a shower.

The High School Dance

The dynamic that amazes me about CES is how far we have not come since high school. Everyone is trying to get the attention of someone who is mostly indifferent to him or her, a person who in turn is trying to get the attention of someone else who couldn't care less about that person. And so on. Thus, I get pitches from every Tom, Dick, and Harry little outfit that thinks that it has something to sell, hoping that I will write or talk about them, and I find myself scrambling to fit into the schedules of the key vendors, my customers and prospects.

Why People Go

Of course, people go for all different reasons. Ken Dulaney of Gartner insists that he doesn't make any client appointments but simply wanders the floor for days to see what's there. He has that luxury, belonging as he does to a firm with lots of sales staff. I do just the opposite. I've got 29 appointments in just two-and-a-half days. Most of them are clients, some are prospects and a few are companies with products that have piqued my curiosity. To me, the floor is an obstacle course I must hurdle (or hurtle across) to get to the next appointment.

But the ultimate reason why everyone goes is -- because everyone goes. Le Tout Industrie will be there.

Roger Kay is President of Endpoint Technologies Associates, an independent technology market intelligence company. Previously, has was vice president of Client Computing at IDC, covering desktop and notebook PCs. Before that, he ran his own research practice, directed operations for a software developer, ran a technology practice for a consulting company, managed international accounts for a hardware manufacturer and developed new products for a network services firm.