Like YouTube? Enjoy Netflix?
Then you’re a bad person! It’s people like you who are destroying our planet and dooming future generations!
I have a dirty little secret to share: I like Microsoft Edge. There, I said it. Phew! Nice to finally have that off my chest!
No more embarrassed looks as I surf the web in the airport lounge. No more keeping Google Chrome open in the background so I can quickly switch lest some tech-savvy passerby glances at my screen and chuckles at my "noobishness."
I remember the time I accidentally stumbled upon a porn shoot in the San Fernando Valley, CA. The headliners were infamous wife-beater (and sliced manhood holder) John Wayne Bobbitt and some chick named Belladonna (Stevie Nicks dies a little inside every time I say that name).
As I recall, the title card on the set said something about "bigger, longer, uncut!" And that’s what I thought of when I first laid eyes on the Samsung Galaxy S8: "Damn, is that thing LONG!" And I don’t mean that in a positive, "you should be in porn, fella!" kind of way. I mean it as criticism -- as in, "it’s so long you’ll look stupid holding it up to your face!"
Those who have followed me over the years know that I came somewhat late to the mobile computing party. I didn’t buy my first smartphone until 2014 -- an el-cheapo Samsung Galaxy Avant running Android 4.4.2. However, after languishing in the hinterlands of abandoned devices (Samsung never bothered to updated the Avant’s OS past "KitKat"), I finally bit the bullet and this past August splurged on a Galaxy S7 (I went for the nondescript black model to discourage phone thieves).
No question, the Galaxy S7 is a wonderful "piece of kit" (as my UK friends would call it). It’s fast, has plenty of RAM (4GB), and is expandable via microSD card (unlike its immediate predecessor, the Galaxy S6). But while it runs circles around my old Avant in terms of performance, I found the phone’s TouchWiz-enhanced Android 6.0 Marshmallow UI to be uninspiring.
Call me a cheapskate, but I’ve always been a bit stingy when it comes to spending on technology. Maybe it’s all those years spent testing and reviewing hardware for myriad trade publications (and the parade of free "extended loaners" I received). Or maybe it’s my insider knowledge of tech trends that makes me hesitant to pay top dollar for something I know will be obsolete inside of a year. But regardless of the motivation, I’ve steadfastly resisted the "urge to splurge" on high-profile technology products.
Case in point: Apple. When the original iPhone came out, I dismissed it as a toy and stuck with my feature phone. And when the iPad debuted, I ignored the tablet sector entirely for nearly two years before investing in what I thought was a technically superior (and by that time, heavily discounted) Blackberry Playbook.
Maybe it’s my age, but I’ve found that I just don’t have the time or patience to play with Windows betas anymore. The bugs. The instabilities. The bricked PCs. I simply can’t get excited about once again playing guinea pig for Microsoft.
In fact, aside from a minor dalliance with a "Redstone" pre-release build late last year, I have effectively sat-out the entire Anniversary Update testing cycle. I figured, "Windows 10 (RTM) was working great for me. Why muck it up by installing some buggy preview edition?"
What the hell is going on with quality control these days? It seems like every new PC I buy or test has something wrong with it right out of the box. Whether it’s a strange hardware failure, a bizarro software glitch, or something less easily definable, the new machine will undoubtedly go belly up in some fashion within the first six months.
Take Dell’s Inspiron 13, for example. In my quest to find a replacement for my HP Envy x2 (abandoned by Microsoft/Intel/HP) and, later, my Surface 3 (destroyed in an incident involving a moving vehicle, alcohol, and an undomesticated pet monkey), I took one of the company’s 7000 series 2-in-1s home for a weekend of testing and evaluation.
I consider myself a patient person. After more than 25 years in the IT industry you sort of have to be. When I bought my first real hybrid 2-in-1 PC -- an HP Envy x2 -- I learned to put up with the many quirks of the then brand-new Windows 8. And when Windows 8.1 arrived, I tolerated several weeks of display artifacts and other graphical anomalies, confident that they would all get sorted out -- eventually.
Which they did. In fact, for each case a new round of device drivers -- specifically, for the Envy x2’s Atom Z2760 chipset and associated Graphics Media Accelerator (GMA) video subsystem -- cured what ailed it. So it’s understandable that I would expect a similar scenario to play out with Windows 10. After all, Microsoft’s new OS is really just a retread of Windows 8 (which was itself a retread of Windows 7, etc.). And my trusty Envy x2 excels at running Windows 8.1.
"Out of stock". These are familiar words to diehard Apple fans. They go to a web site and select their preferred combination of features from a configurator page only to discover that the product they really want is "temporarily unavailable".
Such manufactured scarcity is de rigueur for customers looking to buy the latest shiny object from Apple's toy chest. However, as sales and marketing tactics go, it’s a fairly new concept for would be Windows device owners. Which is why many will be surprised to encounter an unfamiliar message when trying to buy the highest-end model of the recently announced Surface Book laptop.
Call it the "curse of runaway success". Over the past 20+ years, Microsoft's Office suite has grown from a laughable also-ran in a market dominated by Lotus 123 and WordPerfect to become the dominant productivity platform for both personal and professional computing. Along the way, it has picked up a plethora of sophisticated features and obscure developer plumbing that makes it one of the most complex code bases ever deployed on a PC -- second, perhaps, only to the Microsoft Windows operating system upon which it runs.
No question, the Office of today is an incredibly intricate bit of software. So when casual users, like the Wall Street Journal’s Geoffrey A. Fowler, call on Microsoft to "reboot office" -- ostensibly to make it easier to use in a particular workflow context (e.g. collaboration) -- they demonstrate a fundamental misunderstanding of just what Office is and how difficult it would be to make any wholesale changes to the product.
"Where’s the beef?" That iconic phrase from the annals of advertising yore is just one of the thoughts that come to mind after viewing the recent Windows 10 "Hardware Event" in New York. Microsoft had an opportunity to really "wow" the industry with something new and innovative. Instead, it served up a re-hash of technologies and trends that have been old news for months now:
Surface Pro 4 -- Evolutionary rather than revolutionary, which is a good thing if you’re hawking BMWs and want to keep last year’s customers from feeling cheated, but not so great if you’re trying to showcase true innovation. Performance bump? Modest. Weight reduction? Negligible. Fanless? Only on the lowest-end model, and even then you save very little on weight.
Infinity. Endless. Borderless. Today’s OEMs are obsessed with creating display panels that have no edges. Whether it’s Dell and its new XPS 13 (confirmed), or Microsoft and the forthcoming Surface Pro 4 (rumor), everyone seems to be jumping on the "bezel free" bandwagon.
What a terrible idea!
I make my living with words. I type, I edit, I revise -- it’s been the rhythm of my life for nearly three decades. So when my primary tool of the trade (Microsoft Office) sneezes, my whole world catches the flu.
Case in point: Windows 10 "Insider" build 10547. After updating to this, the most current build of post-RTM Windows 10, I started noticing a new and potentially catastrophic (for me, at least) behavior. Whenever I tried to save a document in Microsoft Word, the application would hang. Any subsequent attempts to load the program and resume working were blocked by the fact that that previous crash had somehow left the document file in question locked by the file system.
It’s fun being a thought leader. You get to watch as others supposedly "discover" an idea or truth that you originated weeks or even months before. In this case it’s the notion that Microsoft’s Surface tablet has become a form factor trend setter for PC designs.
The above linked SuperSite for Windows article is a great read, but far from original. I postulated much the same thing when I declared that your next PC will look like a Microsoft Surface. The difference is that I published my take on the matter over three weeks ago, long before any of us knew what the Google Pixel C tablet would look like. But now that the search giant has jumped on the "kickstand-and-keyboard" bandwagon, my prescient musings have been set in stone.
Call me a smartphone agnostic. Thanks to a quirk of geography and a period of deliberate disengagement from the tech industry, I missed out on the initial wave of the mobile device revolution. By the time I bought my first Android phone, KitKat was already the dominant platform, iOS 8 had just been released, and both BlackBerry and Microsoft had been relegated to the obituary section.
So when I finally did go smartphone shopping on a trip back to the States, my requirements were as modest (I mostly wanted a mobile hotspot for my laptops/tablets) as my budget. All of which led me to my local Metro PCS shop and my first taste of budget Android telephony: A Samsung Galaxy Avant. For the ridiculously low price of $119, I got an unlocked Avant with a 4.5" qHD (960 x 540 pixel) screen, 1.5GB of RAM, 16GB of storage and a quad-core CPU, all tied to an unlimited data plan (another $60) that delivered 50Mbps LTE speeds to my condo in FL.